I did compose a short song for you.

Lets hear it before i destroy it.

When the dark clouds come,
and there's no safe place.
Don't be scared, cos here i am, to chase them away.

Beautiful Beautiful Beautiful Rachel....
Beautiful Beautiful Beautiful...Beautiful Rachel.....

As you sleep at night,
feeling cold and scared.
Here i am, to hold your head, in my arms.

Beautiful Beautiful Beautiful Rachel....
Beautiful Beautiful Beautiful...Beautiful Rachel.....

When the sun comes up,
so does your huge smile.
Big and wide, warm and nice, like your heart.

Beautiful Beautiful Beautiful Rachel....
Beautiful Beautiful Beautiful...Beautiful Rachel.....

Relationships are the least priority in my life.

I cried for you once. I shall not do so again.



Once again, happy 19th Bdae Alvin Foong.

Words cannot express what i am feeling now.
To say its indescrible wld be a lie as no feeling is indescrible. But rather, its made up of many feelings that are mixed in a melting hot pot.All these feelings mixed together, complied with the constant stirring to blend everything.
The result? A rather blank expression on the face but a contortion of facts, feelings and hungriness within.
Read between the lines and u wld find not only 1 line but a tangible mess of messy broken lines flowing out from within.
Seeking solitude hasnt done much good at all. Solace in bliss turned out to be an unleashment of the vile and vicious creature. The Mind. It just gnaws and tears out your concience. It even bares open your essense of life so much so that even the slightest reason to smile just goes right out the window.

Negative withdrawal just fills you faster then you could say "gramaphone".

It filled me. Happy bdae 19th Alvin.

RAWR!!! seems that it is another case of i typed out everything and IE crashes...lolx
well..recap..sorrie for the "2 times per mth" blogging frequency guys..haha
always having mind blocks everytime this posting page loads up. I just realised that for the first time in my life, i can see the unsurmountable pile of work that lays in front of me. And what would sum describe as a virgin experience, i am going to do Pre-Production work..(before work "work") yes my friends..i am going to DO tt...

Am a slacker, Always a slacker, Die a slacker.
Alvin Foong 2005

Bright sunny day with a soccer appointment which i am supposed to go..i really really REALLY shld start exercising..i guess i dont really like doing that alone..its so..boring? ha..exercising shld be fun i reckon..not just..i go down to swim 20 laps and go home! tt plain sucks if u ask me...(sorrie cel) lolx...

Another fact i learned from FHM mag this mth..Atoms living in us? 1 of them would proberly belonged to a famous being...say, Einstein, Shakespeare etc...haha! Maybe tts y i am blogging..my shakespearean atom is acting up again!

Shall be going back to do hsehold chores which i had abandoned (think dusty vacuum cleaner on the floor and a leaf floats by) for the greater pleasures of blogging and the electrifying warmth that i get when i type out this words...tata!

well..a week has past.Today's class was different. We learnt acting. And not just norm acting, but acting from the grand mastro himself Lim Yu Beng! yea..pretty kewl chap with a hearty laugh and a american accent with singaporean twangled inbetween..lol..Acting is..kinda fun i guess? being able to bring out emotions and potray them in ur own individualistic way that no one can ever replicate.

But if u ask me? i feel that acting, though artistic, is a huge lie. Actors are just fake personas that just bluff out their scenes. Most of them would never experienced what they are acting maybe for 5 lifetimes! haha...in turn, the audience gets misled by the real thing and then relate to: "we can nv understand them!" e.g..psychos, murderers etc...shame though...it was great fun having acting class! maybe i wld sign up and discover what is true acting!

past week has been crap. Suddenly realised i am not the "listener" i used to be. Forgetting people, the things that are impt to them, even neglacting resposibilities i have to uphold and do. Pretty fucked u might say...plus all the work i have to hand up TML, THE NEXT DAY, AND THE NeXT neXT DAY. This 3 days is gonna be a pretty rough ride. I am getting close to breaking point, and i havent even started!
*augish wail*

Just wanna lie down on a nice British grassy field and look into the endless cloudy infinite sky. (yes they do have it there and its FUCKING nice...the particular field that i lied on was at Shakespeare's cottage.) oh yes...Rach must be beside me too! hehx..

I received a sms today..it goes like this..
we clap our hands
and love alvin
we clap our hands
and love alvin
love, love, love,
love...Alvin!
love, love, love,
love...Alvin!


haha...thnx darl..tt basically lit up my face like a dang christmas tree...lolx..
and a tribute to Dion Xu kexin..whu forever immortalized the "hopping" song..cheers!
wat ya say YEP thailand peeps?

Why do i feel like a fool? That feeling of feeling extremely stupid and unappreciated comes to mind. Maybe its just one time or forgiveble. I do forgive. But why do i mind the matter so much? I guess its cos i put in so much effort in that 1 gift that i have never made for anyone in my 18 years of life. And what do i get in return? A choice of random gifts that were obviously meant for other people.

So tell me? is it wrong to feel like crap? i think not.

its a wonder what 3 weeks can do to u. (What abt 4 mths eh chia ehrn?)

u feel out-sync with the people here.

Everything feels either too expensive or gives a rip-off feeling.

You don't feel the way least charitable now u know there are worst off people then even singapore's misfortunate.

Everybody is just busy looking at new clothes or having a new makeover.

Worst off, u find urself wanting to go back.

Blue city? try reality check...

"Be thankful for what you have lest you could be borned without them"
Alvin Foong

i realised i am a grey person..i do not have any persona watsoever, my life is a dull piece of b/w painting that is done on cheap newsprint. The same HB pencil that started shading 18 years ago is still shading and will continue shading till either the canvas is full or it just runs out of lead. Its hard to see the future as even the present looks bleak with more b/w events to come. Is it tt hard to add colour?
All i see myself doing week after week is just a same mould...the same "weekly" events that paste itself over and over again..i am crying out for sumthing new! I know i must go and get it myself. But the trouble is...i just dun haf the willingness to!
I do have a bright purple crayon by my side. But i just dunch know how to use it! call me stupid..or wateva~ Maybe i am just too stubborn to learn new things but its just that whenever i wanna do sumting, i just lack the heart to continue it! Could the purple crayon help? Its been helping but i am very afraid it might run thin...

I need entertainment in my life. Having a "working com" only with no watsoever games isnt helping at home. I am sick and tired of my com breaking down on me. I am sick of being cashless. I am bored of home, i am bored of town, i am bored of going out to the same places and doing the same things week after week. Blogging aint gonna help but i guess its the only avenue. Even sch which is reopening tml dont appeal anymore. I think i am going thru a phase that i might shun everything and just rot at home. I desire nothing less then...well..interest?

Fuck it. Lets go rob a bank.

mm..past 3 weeks has been a twirl..Losing track of time as a result of a "no-batt" watch on day 1..lolx..am at darl's hse now to bring her to see the docs..poor lass is still sick from thailand..shall blog abt thailand tonight..dun feel "writish" now..heh..a new change! sumthing more simple...less girly..haha! though hard to see...

if we dream the invisible..we can DO the impossible...